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Love Is... Saying You're Sorry

Updated: Feb 22, 2023


Love sometimes requires that you say that you are sorry. We live in a time, sad to say, when apologies are few. People say and do whatever they feel, and do not consider how it will affect those whom they love. But if we live long enough, we discover that there are consequences to all actions, whether good or bad. Why is it so hard apologizing when we discover that we have been wrong and done wrong? Could it possibly be that we feel somehow that we are always, right? Who in their right mind would live in this crazy mixed up world thinking that they are always right?


When our children were teens, we would sometimes have a family forum where they could say whatever they wanted as long as it was respectful. During one of our forums, my husband said that he felt he was always right no matter what they thought. Of course, he was just trying to get a rise out of them, and man was he successful! Immediately, they both interjected and began telling him how wrong he was to even say it, much less think it. That opened the door for us to discuss what to do when we discover that we have wronged someone and what to do when someone has wronged us. Authentic love is saying, genuinely, “I am sorry that I….” And it helps to express what you have done wrong.


Sometimes I must apologize when I feel that I have done nothing wrong. I think in my grandiose way it is because I love so deeply and care so much for the other party. And many times, when I look back on the situation it was because I had a hidden motive in my heart, and it took God to reveal it. We are so good at fooling ourselves.


In the 70s I went to see the movie “Love Story”. That famous line from the movie, “Love is never having to say that you are sorry” was so dramatic. I have since learned that love must say that you are sorry under many circumstances without making excuses. Genuine love is owning the offense, apologizing for your part and trusting God for the outcome. Can I get an amen or an oh me?

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